Emotional intelligence: journey begins when you ask the question like what is behind the anger?

Previously I felt guilty because of emotional unbalance.  Some days, in the morning I woke up feeling anger on my husband and my step-son. A lot of thoughts came to my mind with different arguments why I should hate them. I couldn’t hug them because of anger and hate. Then, I started to recall that I hate my first husband some days as well. The feelings of anger and irritation intensify before the monthly period. I felt that I was swimming on emotional waves of anger, irritation, guilt, happiness, love during the day. The idea that it is my second marriage inspired me to explore emotional patterns, know them better, become a friend to them and learn how to manage their enormous energy… The journey has begun in 2014 when my 1^st son was born and continue till now…